My Dirty Little-Shhh
by Akuma-Chibi
Summary: When a letter arrives at Henry's house, he's disinclined to reveal a little secret he's been harboring, since before his divorce with his wife. How will a surprise visit from one unrevealed family member affect his 'psychic' son...and his coworkers? A fall out with Abigail? Carlton see's heart's? Spider-man is a Serial Killer?
1. Chapter 1

**My Dirty Little...Shhh~**

**Summary: When a letter arrives at Henry's house, he's disinclined to reveal a little secret he's been harboring, since before his divorce with his wife. How will a surprise visit from one unrevealed family member affect his 'psychic' son...and his coworkers? A fall out with Abigail? Carlton see's heart's? Spider-man is a Serial Killer?!**

**Anime/Manga/TV Show: InuYasha/Psych**

**Pairing: Now why would I tell you that!...It's Lassie/Kagome...DAMN! I CAVED~!**

**Genre: Romance/Humor**

**Rated: M (For Mature Stuff...I'm sure there will be something in this story worth the rating)**

**-x-x-x-**

**It's My Birthday and I'll Die if I Want To,**

**Die if I Want To!**

**-x-x-x-**

**(1989)**

"_**Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday to you, Happy Birthday Dear Shawn, Happy Birthday to you~!"**_

"_**And many more~" Gus sang to his best friend as he watched Shawn eye the candles of the cake.**_

"_**Alright Shawn, make a wish and blow out the candles!" Madeleine's eyes shined brightly at her little boy, now eleven years old.**_

_**Shawn looked at the candles, he had been thinking really hard on his wish this year, and he had finally thought up one. Looking over at Gus who stood next to his little sister, he gave a determined nod, 'I wish I had a baby sister!' Then taking a deep breath, he blew out each candle on the cake.**_

"_**WHOOOO~!"**_

_**~CLAP~CLAP~CLAP~CLAP~CLAP~CLAP~CLAP~**_

_**Shawn smiled, standing up as his mom started cutting pieces of his cake to pass out to his family and friends, he made his way to his dad who was recording the event for his mother, like every year.**_

"_**How's it feel to be eleven, Birthday boy!"**_

_**Shawn shrugged, "I feel the same as I did yesterday, but onto something more important, dad, my wish."**_

"_**Ah, don't tell anyone, it won't come true." Henry smiled, one of his family reserved smiles.**_

"_**No, I promise you, if I don't bring it up now, it's likely to never come true, and then where would I be? I would be another year older, without my wish coming true, and it's my birthday, my wish has to come true!"**_

_**Henry moved the video camera away from his face and gave Shawn a serious look, "I told you last year, and the year before that, and the year before that...I am not buying you a Pineapple Tree."**_

"_**No, it's not a Pineapp─"**_

"_**Or a Kangaroo!"**_

"_**...it's not a Kangaroo either, and before you say Race Car, no, I don't want that either."**_

"_**...alright, go ahead Shawn, tell me what it is you want."**_

_**Shawn smiled, "I want a little sister,"**_

"_**..." Henry dropped the video camera and felt the entire room go silent as all eyes turned to him. Madeleine rushed over worried that something might be wrong.**_

"_**Henry? Are you okay?"**_

"_**Y-yeah, fine...Shawn was just telling me his wish,"**_

_**Madeleine looked on curiously, waiting to be filled in. "Well? What is it? I mean, it must have been good if it made you drop a four hundred dollar video camcorder."**_

"_**I told dad that I wanted a baby sister..."**_

_**Madeleine fell back into the seat behind her and stared in shock at Shawn.**_

"_**Oh, look at the time, Gus, Joy, let's head home!"**_

_**Shawn watched Gus's parents usher him and his sister out of the house. Frowning, he noticed that Gus's parents weren't the only parents preparing their kids to leave. He hadn't even opened his presents yet! Once everyone was gone, he realized he'd said something that had obviously just ended his birthday; seriously, he was starting to wish he'd just asked for a Kangaroo again.**_

"_**...so...I guess the party's over..." Shawn muttered.**_

"_**Shawn, why would you want another sibling?"**_

_**Shawn looked at his mother and shrugged, "Gus has one."**_

"_**If Gus got a tattoo, would you?"**_

"_**Gus would never get a tattoo."**_

_**Henry sighed, "The point, Shawn...just because Gus has something doesn't mean you need to have the same thing he does."**_

"_**But why not! It isn't hard to make a baby! Gus's mom said that she was shopping online when she decided she wanted another baby! So go buy one!"**_

_**Madeleine shook her head, "Is that what Gus's mom said?"**_

_**Shawn nodded, "..."**_

_**Madeleine and Henry shared a look at each other, they would be speaking with the two parents later, that much was certain.**_

"_**...if a baby sister is out of the question, can I get a Kangaroo?"**_

_**Henry shook his head, "Go open your presents, Shawn..."**_

_**Shawn looked to the pile of presents then back at to his mom and dad, "Okay, but this isn't over, we'll continue this conversation later." Leaving, he began opening his gifts with vigor and excitement.**_

**-x-x-x-**

**(Present)**

"No,"

"You can't just brush it off, Shawn."

Shawn rolled his eyes and laughed, "Gus, of course I can brush it off. There is no way you can say, and I mean _honestly_ say, that Jessica Biel is cuter than Jessica Alba."

"Sure I can! Jessica Biel is much cuter!"

"Keh," Shawn stepped out of the way of a rush of officers, seeing Juliet a couple desks away, he walked up and stopped in front of her. "Biel or Alba..."

Juliet looked up and frowned, "I'm sorry, what are you talking about?"

"What Shawn is trying to ask is who you think is cuter, Jessica Biel or Jessica Alba?"

"...Biel...NO! Alba...yeah, she's cuter."

"Che, you two are both crazy, clearly Jessica Biel is more exotic and beautiful, and she's classier."

"I'm agreeing with Spencer on this one, Alba's definitely cuter." Lassiter cut in as he walked up from behind his female partner, "O'Hara, we have a code purple down at the Metropolitan Riviera Theatre."

Shawn frowned, not comfortable with Lassiter taking up sides with him, "Purple, Lassie? Are you sure?"

"Positive Spencer,"

Shawn and Gus followed after the Head Detective and their female detective friend, "I'm disinclined to disagree, my psychic vibes are telling me it's a code Hot Pink!"

Lassiter turned around slowly, looking up at Shawn from where he stood on the steps of the Santa Barbara Police Station, "Spencer, there is no code _Hot Pink_."

"Really, your tie must be messing with my Psychic waves."

Lassiter looked down at his tie, Hot Pink in color, with thin silver stripes running vertically along the fabric. "...let's go O'Hara."

Shawn watched the two climb into the police car, sharing a look with Gus, they both slipped into the back seat of the vehicle. "So a Code Purple..."

Lassiter jumped at the sound of Shawn's voice and the back seat doors shutting. "Damn it, Spencer!"

"...what, did I say something wrong?"

Lassiter looked behind him, "As much as I would enjoy putting you in the back seat of a Police Patrol Vehicle, personally, I don't have the patience for it today."

"Oh, well, just drive and pretend I'm not here. You won't even notice us. Gus and I have gotten particularly good at blending in with our environment." Shawn smiled, "Just the other day, Gus blended in with a group of Catholic School Girls mud wrestling."

Gus looked at Lassiter as he stared contemplatively at him, "They weren't Catholic School Girls! They were College Girls, and they were taking a break after many long weeks of studying for their upcoming oral exam, Shawn."

Shawn shook his head incredulously, "Gus, Gus, Gus...My little Gum Drop Gus...not a single one of those girls were in College. One girl had her uniform _on _in the mud ring, another had her school bag at the table _with _her! On another note, they were all in their last year of Catholic School Girl education...he looked so happy to be playing with those _dirty, dirty_, girls."

Gus nodded with a smirk, "You know that's right."

"..." Looking back in front of him, Lassiter started up the engine, "Buckle up, or I'll make sure you don't leave the back of this vehicle once we arrive."

"Yes Sir, Head Detective Sir!"

The two in the back buckled up as the two in the front shared a look, Juliet gave her partner a sympathetic look that he was only vaguely aware of as he drove to the location of the Code Purple.

"So, what exactly is a, Code Purple?" Gus asked curiously.

Shawn smirked, "Seriously Gus? You've been helping out with all of these cases, and you haven't figured out their codes yet?"

"Like you know,"

"Au contraire mon frère, it means 'Gang Activity'."

"...no it doesn't,"

Lassiter glanced back in his mirror and sighed, "Actually, Gus, yes it does." Looking at Shawn through the mirror, he couldn't help but ask, "Spencer, how did you know that?"

"I told you long ago, Lassie, I took the same Detective Exam that you did."

Juliet frowned, "Yeah, at fifteen...scoring a perfect one hundred..."

"Don't sound so gloomy Jules, if it bugs you so much, I can always school you."

"Shawn..."

"It's completely up to you of course; you know, me and you, teacher and student, you and me, in school..."

"Spencer,"

"Near a desk, on a desk, by a─"

"Shawn!"

Shawn glanced between Gus, Lassiter and a clearly flustered Juliet.

"Guy's, really? I was kidding." The three went back to watching the buildings outside pass by while Shawn looked down at his hands. "Clearly a desk would be too hard on her back,"

Shawn flinched back as a hand connected with his shoulder, "What?!" He stared at his best friend as he shook his head, "Gus?"

**-x-x-x-**

**(A Few Minutes Later)**

"Stay in the car, Spencer."

"Right!"

"..."

_**~SLAM~**_

Shawn laugh a little, "Clearly, after all these years, he hasn't learned anything."

Gus simpered at the thought, "Clearly,"

The two watched as the pair of detectives disappeared behind the movie theater before climbing out of the car. Shawn made to follow when he noticed someone looking over his shoulder cautiously, looking at the man's hand, a little bit of red graffiti on his wrist and a black tattoo of...something, kind of wrapping around his mostly covered arm; perspiration on his brow made Shawn frown. Gus called his name and he looked to his friend, "Nah, let's go this way."

Walking as confidently as ever up to the man, he smiled charmingly and held out his hand, "Hello there friend, the name is Shawn Spencer, psychic, and this is my friend Hot Coco McMudslide."

"..." The man looked at him curiously, "You them?"

Shawn shared a look with Gus and scoffed, "...if by 'them' you mean _them_, then what do you think?"

"Sorry man, I-I just...I was expectin'..."

"You hear him Mudslide? DO YOU HEAR HIM!?" Shawn rubbed at his face, "What the hell do they call you? Huh!?"

"Eric! My name is Eric Krossling! Look, I was just supposed to give this to you and leave, so here, take it!"

Shawn watched him pullout an envelope before holding it out to him and Gus, Gus cocked his head, looked at the envelope, than snatched it from _Eric_ who was quick to run away.

"I can't believe he gave it to us..." Shawn frowned, "It never goes that well...I mean...well, does it?"

Gus shrugged, "Maybe you should tell Lassiter how this one _really_ happened, no one is going to believe that you psychically found this letter; not only that, what if they end up capturing that Eric fellow? Huh? What then? If he points out that he gave this to you, it could cause problems."

"Dude, you really care for Psych, don't you."

"No Shawn, I care about being thrown in jail! Hindering a Criminal Investigation is a Criminal Offense, Shawn!"

"...Yes, I'm aware. Chief Vic said as much the first time I met her."

"..."

"Hey! What the hell did I tell you Spencer?!"

Shawn frowned, "Why don't you ever yell at Gus?"

"Gus is smart enough to stay when told to stay."

"Oh," Shawn looked to his friend, turning his back to Lassiter, "Tell me Gus, do you sit and play dead too?"

Gus gave him one of his deadpanned expressions. "...Shawn, tell them..."

"...Tell us what, Spencer?"

Shawn looked between the three of his _friends_, "Here..." He held out the envelope and Lassiter took it, putting his gun up in its holster before flipping and turning the envelope as he inspected it.

"What is it?"

"I don't know, but Eric Krossling seemed really happy to be getting rid of it. I'm not one hundred percent sure this has anything to do with your Code Purple...as much as I think it has to do with my Code Hot Pink."

Lassiter rolled his eyes before walking off with the letter, Juliet and Gus following behind. Shawn looked back to where Eric Krossling had been standing and frowned, "Weird..."

**-x-x-x-**

**Me: Here is the first chapter of my PSYCH/IY fic!**


	2. Chapter 2

**My Dirty Little...Shhh~**

**Summary: When a letter arrives at Henry's house, he's disinclined to reveal a little secret he's been harboring, since before his divorce with his wife. How will a surprise visit from one unrevealed family member affect his 'psychic' son...and his coworkers? A fall out with Abigail? Carlton see's heart's? Spider-man is a Serial Killer?!**

**Anime/Manga/TV Show: InuYasha/Psych**

**Pairing: Now why would I tell you that!...It's Lassie/Kagome...DAMN! I CAVED~!**

**Genre: Romance/Humor**

**Rated: M (For Mature Stuff...I'm sure there will be something in this story worth the rating)**

**-x-x-x-**

**It's My Birthday and I'll Die if I Want To,**

**Die if I Want To!**

**PART TWO**

**-x-x-x-**

Books were opened all over the floors of Psych Detective Agency, and on a desk, sitting cross-legged with his hands held out in the meditative state, was Shawn Spencer, eyes shut, mouth shut, and humming something that sounded oddly similar to 'Huuuuummm~Sweet baby pineapple! Huuuuummm~Sweet mama pineapple! Huuuuummmm~Sweet papa pineapple!' and so on.

Gus entered the building with his cellphone pressed between his shoulder and ear as he looked over a paper and held his suitcase with his other hand. "...yes sir," He said firmly, looking around for Shawn as he entered the front entrance of Psych, walking through the door to their office, his eyes widened and he stared at the mess his _friend_ had made.

"I understand sir, thank you...goodbye.

"How is poor Kibble?"

"...Shawn, I don't appreciate being told to leave and take care of my _dog_ which I don't own. Does this dog even exist!?"

"Yes," Shawn opened his eyes and jumped off the desk, "He belongs to your dead great grandmother, an ancient dog which has lived well past his prime, and your family thinks its nearing its end, but Kibble doesn't let old age slow him down. Now, onto more important things...I went back to the location of Code Hot Pink."

Gus stared at his friend for a moment before shaking his head and turning to leave, "I'm going back to work."

"Gus! This is work too! And I found something...but, I can't...be sure." Shawn pulled out his phone and pulled up a picture before showing it to Gus.

Taking the phone with a skeptical look, Gus turned his eyes to the picture and his eyes squinted as he tried to see the picture. "That looks like...a black widow..."

Shawn nodded, "Strange, right?"

"No." Gus handed the phone back to Shawn, "Actually, Black Widows aren't all that rare in California, Shawn, now...tell me this isn't the reason you made up a half-dead dog for me."

"No, that was only part of the reason," Shawn handed him back the phone, "Look at the next picture,"

Shawn walked off to the desk and looked at the laptop that was open on their desk.

"Now that...isn't normal."

"And the next one,"

"..." Gus looked at the picture with a frown, "Code Purple?"

Shawn nodded, "Looks like Lassie's Code Purple was more involved with my Code Pink than I originally thought."

Gus rolled his eyes, "I don't think there was ever a Code Purple..."

"Neither...do I...look," Shawn turned the laptop for Gus and watched his friends eyes widen. "This picture was taken in Japan...A week ago,"

"Just one week, but that doesn't mean it was drawn a week ago..."

Shawn nodded, "So I checked the police records, I used my dad's log-in, but go figure, it was classified...however, I found a news report on it, here..."

Gus looked at the article clipping on the laptop, "Gang activities or the sign that death is coming? The Black Widow has been made a known bearer of bad news for anyone who lives in the house which has been marked by its sign. With this particular tagging, the residents of Japan are becoming restless in their daily lives as they fear becoming the Black Widow's next victim. Who this Black Widow is, and where the Black Widow will strike next is not known until after the tag has been spotted. Then within the day, the tagged residents are found dead, one way or another...seriously!? The tag was on a movie theater!"

Shawn nodded, "Yeah, and with the tag comes a nest of Black Widows...how popular are they in Japan?"

"I don't know..."

"In Osaka, more than one thousand Black Widows were found, and a Black Widow can lay up to three hundred eggs per sac," he pushed a book to Gus who looked at it and stared. "That was in 1995; they were cleared out within a few weeks, no one knows where they went." He grabbed a page from the printer and laid it out flat on the desk, "I have an idea."

Gus took the page and looked at it in horror, "Is that what I think that is?"

"A little girl, I think the file said she was nine, and that is what's left of her."

"I'm gonna be sick,"

"Not yet you aren't." Shawn said, sitting down on the edge of the desk as he read off of the other paper in his hands, "Nearly eighteen thousand Black Widows have been caught at Iwanuki, a Marine Corps Air Station in Japan, these spiders are _not_ native to Japan, and this article was covered in 2006, and started appearing six years prior to the article being written." He handed the page to Gus who was still staring at the body on the other page, "The accumulated spiders' wen missing nearly a year ago..."

"...Black Widow?"

"Obviously...look at this," he pulled another page from the printer.

"Is she also dead?"

"No, she has gone missing. Her family was marked with the Black Widow insignia, her mother, brother, and grandfather have already been proclaimed dead, they don't know who her father is, and they don't know where she went."

"...Damn...she's four years younger than you..."

"Yeah, Kagome Higurashi, part Caucasian and part Japanese, her father is unknown, Caucasian, her mother, Japanese, deceased..."

"Are you playing Psychic or..."

"...lets go," Shawn grabbed a file and placed all the pages he'd printed in it and tore a few from the books he'd been reading before grabbing the laptop and putting it on Hibernate.

"Psychic?"

"What do you think Gus?"

**-x-x-x-**

Lassiter was on the phone when he saw Shawn and Gus walking towards them, pointing at the two of them, he pointed back towards the door as he continued talking. Both looked around, acting as if they didn't see him. Quickly finishing up the call, he hightailed it after the duo detectives. "What are you tyrants doing here,"

"Why, Lassie, I thought you enjoyed our moments together!" Shawn said as he feigned injury to his heart.

"...leave..."

"Bu-AH! G-GUS!" Shawn through himself at his friend and pretended to be having a vision, much like he always did. Gus rolled his eyes as he pushed him off and towards Lassiter who closed his eyes and sidestepped the annoyance known as Shawn Spencer, opening his eyes in time to see him run into the wall and fall to the floor twitching in a very over exaggerated routine...like normal.

"That's a good look for you Spencer, now get up and get out." Already a crowd was starting to form, which meant witnesses, and believers, and the Chief... "Damn it Spencer! Get up!" He watched as Shawn started to crawl around, and if he were honest with himself, it was quite unnerving to watch. "What the hell are you doing!?"

"He's a spider..."

Shawn stopped crawling around and turned to the unfamiliar voice. His eyes widened and he fell onto the floor before standing and making his way to Gus, looking to his friend who seemed just as shocked, he looked back at the girl, pointed at her, then looked back to Gus.

"And who are you?" Lassiter asked in an annoyed tone.

The girl faced him, and hurt blue eyes met his and he seemed to be pulled in to them from a very high spot on his pedestal which he was so used to looking down on people from. "...here," she held a file out to Lassiter, "Your spider friend dropped it..." with that said, she walked off back down the hall where she had only come up to see what the commotion was; her black hair trailing behind her as she moved gracefully, weaving in and out of the crowd.

Looking curiously at the file, he looked to Shawn who was still surprised by the girl's presence to say anything. Opening the file, he looked down and came face to face with the familiar backdrop of the theater he had been at just the other day, the background on the wall, on another building, a house. He looked at the picture behind it and saw the girl from earlier staring back at him, a missing person's flyer. "Kagome Higurashi..."

He made his way through the crowd and past Shawn he snapped out of his shock and followed Lassiter, pulling Gus along as well.

The three of them found Kagome talking in hushed tones with Chief Vick, all eyes on the two ladies, until the front door was thrown open and their eyes reverted to the person standing there at the entrance of Santa Barbara Police Department.

"Dad?"

Lassiter was also curious as to why Spencer's father was there, but he said nothing as the older man turned his eyes to their Chief and walked briskly over to her. Sure that he was going to talk to his Chief, he never expected the older man to throw his arms around the girl and pull her into a hug, and by the looks of Shawn, the older Spencer's son was equally just as shocked by his actions as everyone else. "McNab!" Lassiter grabbed the passing officer by the sleeve, "What is going on?"

"Oh, Chief Vick is taking on a relocation case, but...the girl is here on her own free will, she came here for her dad."

"Whose...her dad..." Shawn asked from beside Lassiter, though, it didn't take a Psychic to figure out the answer to his inquiry.

"_...dad..."_

That word echoed in their ears, and Shawn felt dread wash over him as he turned and walked off in the other direction.

Lassiter looked between the reunion and Shawn before sighing and following after the guy who had solved and helped solve, a great many cases, and the guy who, Lassiter unwillingly admitted, to being friends with.

**-x-x-x-**

**Me: I love Psych! The next list is completely PoT/IY enjoy!**

**U****pdates will come out a little faster than previously! I'll be starting lists from now on, posting them at the end of each chapter, so you'll know what has been both updated, and next to be updated.**

LIST 2

Stealing Kisses

The Rings

I'm Not Crazy (new fic)

Daddy's Little Girl

Shapeless Song

Heart NOT For Sale (new fic)

Eiji Bunny-Chan

The Letter

TAKE TAKE TAKE

Big Brother (new fic)

**Me: The list will be made by Yuki subsequently, once I finish the last story on the list. Please Review, and let me know what you think. If there is anything specific that you want on the list, talk to YukimuraShuusukeGirl, I have no say in it!**


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